I have been lucky enough to work with a variety of clients recently on their Future Focus.
The 1:1 sessions started with, where they are now, where they wanted to be and how they were going to get there.
During the course of our sessions it became apparent that the word I was using was jarring with each of them.
I was using the word Goal, which made one client shudder and one become closed and defensive.
‘the result or achievement toward which effort is directed; aim; end.’
‘to intend or direct for a particular effect, something intended or desired to be attained by one’s efforts; purpose
‘an involuntary vision occurring to a person when awake.’
I asked them to choose the word that felt most comfortable to them and to use this going forward. This helped enormously in their understanding of the Future Focus content and in turn, made it completely relevant to them as individuals.
I am sure that you have had conversations were a word you have used has caused an unexpected reaction.Listening to the language of the person you are talking to gives so many clues. When we use words that are comfortable to others we gain greater understanding and develop deeper relationships.
We can also help ourselves by changing the words we use, such as ‘should’ which implies we ‘must’ do whatever the task is. If we stop and ask ourselves “Why should I or why must I ?” We then give ourselves the freedom of choice, that can result in a very different outcome – go on try it.
The feed back from my clients has been extraordinary its all in their words!